Gay is a term that primarily refers to a homosexual person, or to the trait of being homosexual.
The word was originally a reference to being lighthearted, cheerful, carefree, or showy. Although it can still be used to express these traits, today, it is most often understood to be a reference to homosexuality.
Given that "lesbian" is most often used to refer to women who have a romantic or sexual orientation toward other women, "gay" is primarily used to describe men who are attracted to other men in a romantic, erotic, or emotional sense. In that sense, gay is more commonly associated with men, while lesbian pertains explicitly to women who are attracted to the same sex.
Gay is an adjective used to describe people (generally male) who are physically, romantically, and emotionally attracted to other people of the same gender. Although it would be grammatically correct to refer to women who are attracted to women as gay, the more common term is lesbian, so gay is sometimes reserved for men who are attracted to other men.
Generally, gay is used as an adjective. However, it has sometimes been used as a noun. As a noun, it can be seen in the names of some gay rights organizations, such as Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG) and Children of Lesbians and Gays Everywhere (COLAGE). It is sometimes used as a noun referencing individuals, as in "he is a gay," but this usage is often perceived as derogatory, whereas "he is gay" would be acceptable.
Beginning in the 1980s and 1990s, the word has sometimes been used as a pejorative (meaning "lame), as in "that is so gay." In 2023, the American Psychological Association described this usage of the term as heterosexist and heteronormative, while the BBC has criticized this usage as homophobic.
Since modes of sexuality in non-Westernized cultures may differ from those prevalent in the West, the concept of a gay identity may not be used or understood in the same way as it is in the West.
Some gay individuals and organizations reject the term homosexual as a label because they find it to be too clinical and reminiscent of the time when homosexuality was considered a mental disorder. On the other hand, others may reject the term gay as an identity label because they don't wish to identify with the larger LGBTQIA+ community or due to its use as a pejorative. Some prefer to be called queer. Others find labels to be too confining.
Nevertheless, most style guides recommend the use of the term gay to refer to all people exclusively attracted to members of the same sex, while lesbian refers specifically to female homosexuals, and gay men to male homosexuals.
The use of gay in reference to a homosexual man was first applied to prostitution. A gay boy was a young man or adolescent who served male clients, and its application to homosexuality is believed to have been a sexualized extension of its definition of uninhibited or carefree, which implied a willingness to set conventional sexual mores aside.
In film, the term was first used as a reference to homosexuality in the 1938 film, Bringing Up Baby, in which Cary Grant's character is forced to don a woman's feather-trimmed robe when his clothes are sent to the cleaners. When asked about the robe, he replied, "Because I just went gay all of a sudden."
By whatever term, this portion of our guide focuses on gay men, gay issues, and gay lifestyles.
Recommended Resources
Since 1998, the website appears to be the work of a single author, Frank Harrell (aka Cowboy Frank), webmaster for the Gay Rodeo History Project, the International Gay Rodeo Association, and My Drummer Leather Magazine Collection. Included are several blog-type articles about various topics, including his battles with prostate cancer, anal cancer, and AIDS, as well as his life as a gay man, camping trips, campgrounds, and general life accounts. Links to his YouTube channels are included.
http://cowboyfrank.net/
Featuring the campaign that won the gay marriage fight in the United States, spawning a global movement, the national strategy is highlighted here, including a biography of its founder, introducing its staff, and donors, and highlighting pertinent publications, testimonials, annual reports, and a celebration video. A review of how the campaign came to be, why it matters, and lessons learned are included. An interactive map of the United States can be used to highlight victories in the states.
http://www.freedomtomarry.org/
This online directory is comprised of only gay-friendly and open-minded companies. Since 2005, Gay Pages has made it easy for potential customers to find gay-friendly contractors, professionals, and other businesses, allowing LGBTQ individuals to support companies that support them. The reasons why a company should advertise to the gay community are outlined, along with statistics regarding the gay population and advertising options. Its plans, pricing, and advertising opportunities are posted.
https://www.gaypages.com/
Stylized GaySpeak, the online discussion forum is targeted at gay men. While anyone may read the forum discussions, participation requires registration of an account and a login. Various categories and sub-forums are set up to organize forum topics, such as a general discussion area, help and advice, people, entertainment, news, events, and polls. While the forum is intended for gay individuals, there are plenty of areas for discussion of other topics, particularly from a gay perspective.
https://gayspeak.com/
Formerly Gay Men's Health Crisis, the New York City-based non-profit, volunteer-supported community AIDS service organization, was created to help end the AIDS epidemic in 1982, and this remains a focal point of its efforts. Its services include health and nutrition advice, legal, housing, mental health support, vocational training, and case management; it also offers free hot meals in its dining room. Its address, contacts, volunteer opportunities, and advocacy resources are included.
https://www.gmhc.org/
International Gay Rodeo Association
Founded in 1985, the IGRA is the sanctioning body for gay rodeos throughout the United States and Canada, as well as the largest group coordinating rodeo events welcoming lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and heterosexual participants and spectators. The organization is comprised of several regional rodeo associations. Schedules, bylaws, and proposals may be downloaded in PDF format, and an online store offers promotional apparel and other items. Contacts are posted on the site.
http://www.igra.com/
KGAY 106.5 is an AM radio station broadcasting from Thousand Palms, California, to the LGBT community with a talk and EDM radio format. Programming is simulcast on FM translator station 106.5 K293CL, also in Thousand Palms. Its Palm Springs desert guide discusses the station and its programming. It also features LGBT-oriented events, bars, dining facilities, clothing-optional gay resorts, vacation rentals, hotels, shopping venues, a business directory, and contacts.
https://gaydesertguide.com/
Since 1996, the site has focused on older gay men and their admirers. It is an offshoot of Swan, a magazine for older gay men that began publishing in the late 1980s. The membership site is free for everyone, although those who can afford a paid membership will receive extra access, including the chance to vote on new developments. It includes photos, events, news, site listings, stories, meetups, a chat area, and an online discussion area, although access requires membership and a login.
https://oldergay.men/
Adam Groffman quit his job as a graphic designer to travel the world and write a blog. He has since lived in several places and visited many others. His travel blog relates his gay stories, and gives nightlife tips, and offers restaurant reviews, favorite shops, and personal essays from his adventures around the world. Destinations are featured, along with city guides, and content may also be found through various themes or topical categories, or chronologically.
https://travelsofadam.com/
